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TalkStarters

A lot of people I speak with say they’d like to feel more comfortable talking about sexuality with their partner or their kids, but don’t know how to start. So I’ll help! Part of what makes it hard is that we don’t do it very often. Sex is private and not a suitable topic in polite company. But there are plenty of things about sex and its meaning to us that are worth thinking about, and worth talking about.

Every couple of weeks, I’ll post a TalkStarter you can use to get conversations going with people important to you. Some are suitable for couples; some for you and any adults you’re close to; some for parents with kids of various ages. Hopefully the TalkStarters will give you food for thought and food for conversation.

TalkStarter: Parents Are So Embarrassing

August 31, 2016 by Jill Whitney

When you’re a teenager, pretty much everything your parents do is embarrassing. But anything they say or do related to sex? Especially if anyone else is around? OMG–mortifying. Even if it’s been a long time since you were a teen, I bet you can remember things your parents said about sex that embarrassed you. This […]

Filed Under: Everyone, Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, For Parents of Young Children, TalkStarters Tagged With: parenting, preteens, sexuality, teens

TalkStarter: Gender and Restrooms

June 22, 2016 by Jill Whitney

There’s been a lot in the news lately about who can use which restrooms. A recent federal mandate requires schools to permit students to use the restroom that matches their gender identity, even if that’s not the sex on their birth certificate. Whatever your views on the subject, it’s a great opener for talking with […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, TalkStarters Tagged With: gender, gender identity, parenting, sexuality, teens, transgender

The Key to Getting Teens to Open Up

May 26, 2016 by Jill Whitney

There’s so much going on in your teen’s head and heart—but that doesn’t mean you’re hearing about it. When our darling little kids become adolescents, parents can feel that there’s a wall between us and them. We care so much about what’s going on inside them, but they may be reluctant to share. This is […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, TalkStarters Tagged With: communication, parenting, teens

TalkStarter for Adults: What Has Sex Meant to You at Different Times?

April 7, 2016 by Jill Whitney

Sex is such a rich and complex part of the human experience. It means a lot to most people—and it can mean different things at different times in our lives. What has been your experience of sex? How has your view of sex changed at various stages of your life? Did its meaning change when […]

Filed Under: Everyone, Featured, TalkStarters Tagged With: meaning, relationships, sex

TalkStarter for Teens & Preteens: Sex That Sells

March 5, 2016 by Jill Whitney

Have you ever stopped to think about how many ads use sex to sell a product? So many do that we can become numb to them. But if you stop to notice, you’ll see attractive people, mostly women, in advertising for every imaginable product. Many of these women are wearing tight, skimpy clothes and often […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, TalkStarters Tagged With: advertising, communication, media, parenting, preteens, sex, teens

TalkStarter: Valentine’s Day Topics for Couples

February 14, 2016 by Jill Whitney

Some couples are good to go when it comes to Valentine’s Day. You know a way to celebrate that’s fun for both of you, you’re happy with your relationship and your sex life, and it’s comfortable to talk about things. But other couples…might need a little boost. If you’d like a little help getting the […]

Filed Under: Everyone, Featured, TalkStarters Tagged With: couples, romance, sex, Valentine's Day

TalkStarter for Young Kids: But How Did the Baby Get in There?

January 16, 2016 by Jill Whitney

The easiest way to teach kids about pregnancy and conception is to let them ask—as most little kids will when they see a pregnant woman. “Why does Aunt Julie have a big belly?” “Why is Mrs. Smith so fat?” Your job is to answer the question—and continuing answering the follow-up questions until your child seems […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Young Children, TalkStarters Tagged With: conception, pregnancy, sex ed

TalkStarter: Is “Baby, It’s Cold Outside” About Date Rape?

December 9, 2015 by Jill Whitney

Everyone knows the song Baby, It’s Cold Outside, performed by numerous artists over the years. I’ve always liked it—it’s fun, creative, and playful (and in a range I can sing along to 🙂 ). So I was a bit taken aback a couple years ago when a young woman I know referred to it as […]

Filed Under: Everyone, Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, TalkStarters Tagged With: date rape, seduction

TalkStarter for Kids: Gender Roles in Holiday Classics

December 1, 2015 by Jill Whitney

What does the holiday story of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer have to do with sex ed? Well, not much to do with sex, really.  🙂 But classic movies do give parents an opportunity to talk about gender roles and societal expectations. This is especially true for movies that were made in an earlier era. What […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Young Children, TalkStarters Tagged With: gender roles

TalkStarters: 22 Things Your Teen Is Wondering About Sex and Relationships

November 19, 2015 by Jill Whitney

Teenagers can be tough to read. You know their heads are full of thoughts and questions about sex and relationships, but exactly what’s going on in there…who knows? Obviously every kid is different. But the young adults who responded to my survey give some clues about common questions and concerns. When I asked what they […]

Filed Under: Featured, For Parents of Teens and Preteens, TalkStarters Tagged With: dating, sex, teens

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About the Author

Jill Whitney is a licensed marriage and family therapist dedicated to improving communication about relationships, sexuality, and intimacy. Learn more about her and her practice at Green Tree Professional Counseling.

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