The other day I was chatting with a friend I don’t see often but with whom I’m friends on LinkedIn. He said something about it being lucky his company’s filters didn’t block my “uh…interesting posts.” He meant, of course, what I write about sexuality and especially the importance of talking about intimacy and sexual health […]
When You Want to Make Love (Not Just Have Sex)
“Making love” used to be a euphemism for having sex, back when people tried to avoiding saying “sex” (unless they were referring to gender). Now, we talk about sex in so many ways that “making love” sounds sort of quaint. But it’s quaint in a good way—like building a wood fire or playing a board […]
Should Busy Couples Schedule Sex?
Your lives are super-busy. What with jobs, taking care of the kids, dealing with the house, and just daily life, you hardly get any time alone with your partner. Even when you do, one or both of you may be so wiped out that sex just isn’t happening. That’s the reality…but it rots. You aren’t […]
What Good Guys Need to Know about Consent
There’s been a lot in the news about sexual predators like Jeffrey Epstein taking advantage of many, many girls. You may also have heard that a fairly small percentage of college men are responsible for a disproportionate percentage of campus sexual assaults. It’s relatively few people (almost all of them male) make a habit, even […]
How (Casual) Sex Is Like Ice Cream
Ice cream is awesome, right? I’m not a big dessert person, but ice cream…well, it’s hard to resist. Still, I eat ice cream far less often than I’d like to because I don’t like the consequences. Unlike my cousin Bert, one of those lucky, lots-of-exercise people who can eat whatever he wants without gaining weight, […]
Casual Sex: Is It Right for You?
Sometimes it seems like everyone is having sex with lots of people they hardly know. That’s actually not the case; many people choose physical intimacy only when they feel emotionally intimate. Other people have sex casually and love it; others hook up and don’t really like it. One size does not fit all. The key […]
How Often Should Couples Have Sex?
When people wonder how often they “should” have sex, one of two things is likely going on. Sometimes they’re anxious about whether they’re “normal.” We talk so little about healthy sexuality that many of us don’t know where we stand, so we worry. The good news on this: The range of “normal” in human sexual […]
Should I Wait for “The One”?
People who are looking for a relationship often wonder how they’ll know when they’ve found the perfect partner, The One of all the people in the world with whom they’ll have years of bliss. We’ve all seen the movies; we know how it’s supposed to go. You may be dating, even engaged, to a pretty […]
Raising Decent Kids in the #MeToo Era
You’re trying to raise your kids to be good people. You want them to respect themselves and others. You want them to be responsible, including about relationships and, when the time comes, sex. That was hard enough before; since #MeToo aimed a spotlight on sexual harassment and assault, you may be even more concerned about […]
The Under-Appreciated Joys of Anticipation
We live in a world of immediate gratification. We want to watch the next episode now, we want our package delivered today, we get antsy if we have to wait in line for more than a few seconds. I understand the feeling; there’s always so much to do that waiting can feel like a waste. […]
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