Talking with your teen about sex improves his or her health. Obviously, knowledge about sex, reproduction, contraception, and sexually-transmitted infections goes a long way to preventing STIs and unplanned pregnancies. That information can come from you, from the school’s sex-ed program or health teacher, and from your child’s healthcare provider. But there are a couple […]
“A Woman’s Greatest Asset…
is a man’s imagination.” Have you heard that expression? If you grew up a few decades ago, you probably have. Lately, though, we don’t think that way—and our sex lives have lost something as a result. If you think about what’s sexy, it often isn’t nudity. Not that nudity is unsexy; it’s just that little […]
How Is Your Marriage Affecting Your Kid’s Future Sex Life?
When we think of teaching kids about sex, we usually think of buying books for them and having “The Talk” (or, better, a series of many talks). But the way we behave in our own marriage/partnership is at least as important for our kids’ future sex lives. From watching how the two of you interact, […]
Hookups and the Half-Way Heart
So, there’s this thing I see happening among 20-somethings. I keep hearing various young people talk about themselves or friends having hooked up with someone they’ve got history with. It may be someone they recently broke up with, and “it felt so comfortable and the sex just happened.” Or they’re semi-broken up, but haven’t really […]
TalkStarter for Teens and Preteens: Styles at School
Teen styles are constantly changing, but one thing is true every year: Kids dress for social impact. They may not care what adults think about their clothing choices, but they care hugely what their peers think. Because many teens and preteens have so much energy about clothes, it’s a great opener for parents into their […]
One Time You Should Never Talk to Your Kid About Sex
As any regular reader of this blog knows, I’m a big fan of talking about sexuality. Having lots of small conversations over many years works best, and there are all kinds of things in daily life that can give parents an opening. But there is one time that the young adults I surveyed often mentioned […]
The 5 Minutes a Day That Are Crucial for Your Relationship
How do you get the big things right in a relationship? Often, by getting the little things right. When I work with couples who want to improve their relationships, I encourage them to focus on concrete things each of them can do that will help make things better. Surprisingly often, the specific things they ask […]
TalkStarter for Teens: The NH Prep School Sexual Assault Case
The recent sexual assault case at a New Hampshire prep school is a tragedy for both teens involved (and their families). But it does give other parents an opportunity to talk with their kids about situations and choices that can cause legal and emotional trouble—and about how to avoid decisions that have long-term repercussions. In […]
What Is “Good Sex,” Anyway?
We sometimes talk about “good sex”—wanting it for ourselves and for those we love. But what exactly do we mean by that? Experts consider sex “good” when four things are true: It’s consensual: Both parties agree to whatever activities happen. It’s safe: There is no transmission of an STI, no unwanted pregnancy, no physical or […]
When It Comes to Talking With Your Kid About Sex, What Have You Done Right?
A lot of the people who come to my workshops on talking with kids about sexuality feel like they don’t know where to start. But most of them have already taken at least some steps toward providing information and/or opening a dialogue. You probably have, too, even if the whole topic still feels a bit […]
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