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Dedicated to Improving Communication about Relationships, Sexuality, and Intimacy

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Feeling “Meh” About Sex Tonight? Your Relationship Status Matters

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If the person next to you wants to have sex tonight and you’re not sure whether you’re in the mood, should you do it? It depends on who the person next to you is. Suppose the person who’s looking for action is someone you don’t know well or who just wants casual sex. If you […]

Why That Hottie Might Not Be the Best Date

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What kind of person would you like to date? You probably have a list of things you’re looking for—and one quality you want is “attractive.” Because, well, we’re attracted to attractive people; there’s something about their physical appeal that pulls us in. It’s natural to be drawn toward beauty/handsomeness/sexiness. Who wouldn’t want that in a […]

Home Alone Too Often? 10 Ways to Meet New People

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We humans evolved to need connection with other people. Like other mammals, we need the pack or the herd for safety and companionship. But modern life makes social connection (the in-person kind) harder than it was when we lived in villages with extended family all around. Many people are lonely, would like more friends, or […]

How Is Your Marriage Affecting Your Kid’s Future Sex Life?

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When we think of teaching kids about sex, we usually think of buying books for them and having “The Talk” (or, better, a series of many talks). But the way we behave in our own marriage/partnership is at least as important for our kids’ future sex lives. From watching how the two of you interact, […]

Trust Is Not a Monolith

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Every couple weeks, someone in my therapy office says something like “I just can’t trust him/her at all.” Usually they’re saying that the person has let them down in some way. Sometimes the trust injury is major, like having had an affair, and sometimes it’s something much smaller. One of the things that makes committed […]