TalkStarter for Adults: What Was Your First Time Like?

August 10, 2015 by Jill Whitney

For a moment, think back to the first time you had (consensual) sex. Is it a fond memory? an awful one? something in between? People have a huge range of experiences in this area, and those early experiences can color our sexual perspective and reactions long after. What impact has your first time had on […]

The “Date-Rape Avoidance Plan” You Can Start in Preschool

July 30, 2015 by Jill Whitney

If your kids are young, you may not be thinking much about their sexuality. But keeping the long view in mind can help you teach subtle lessons that will pay off when they’re older. For instance, children need to learn that each person is responsible for his or her own body. If your son does […]

TalkStarter for Preteens: What’s the Buzz at Camp?

July 16, 2015 by Jill Whitney

If your teen or preteen goes to camp, she’s put into an environment with kids outside her usual social milieu. Crushes, romances, and rivalries can develop; fascinating information (or misinformation, or rumors) about puberty and sex may be shared around the campfire. Kids may start thinking about these things more or differently than they usually […]

How Many Sex Partners Have Young Adults Really Had?

July 9, 2015 by Jill Whitney

If you watch much media these days, you’d think that most teens and young adults are constantly having casual sex. Hook-ups and experimentation are routine; it’s normal to have lots of sexual partners. Except—what if that’s not true in the real world? How many sex partners do young people really have? My survey of 900 […]

Instead of “The Talk,” Try “The Drip Method”

July 2, 2015 by Jill Whitney

When your parents told you about sex (if they did), was it all at once? A big, overwhelming “The Talk” that left you feeling like a deer in headlights—overwhelmed, and unable to absorb everything they’d said? Give credit where due: Having one big Talk is much better than saying nothing. (And if your parents talked […]

TalkStarter for Teens: SCOTUS on Gay Marriage

June 27, 2015 by Jill Whitney

The June 26 Supreme Court decision legalizing gay marriage in all 50 states is a wonderful opportunity for parents to talk with their teens and young adults. What are your kid’s friends saying about the ruling on social media? Do they all think the ruling is a great thing? (Most of the young people I’m […]

How Your Marriage Is Like a Picnic Basket

June 26, 2015 by Jill Whitney

Couples often find themselves bewildered by their partner’s behavior. “Why on earth does he do that?” “Doesn’t she know what she’s doing doesn’t make sense?” “What is he thinking?” “It’s obvious we should be doing this differently.” Often, the confusion stems from our unrecognized expectations. We may think we’re being rational and clear, but to […]

TalkStarter for Adults: Are Porn and Romance Novels Equivalent?

June 18, 2015 by Jill Whitney

Porn can be a very charged topic, especially for women. Some women enjoy porn regularly; others are horrified that their partner would ever view it (even though most men do, whether frequently or occasionally). I’ve known women who were appalled that their husbands view porn, but who themselves regularly enjoy steamy romance novels. This got […]

What Your Son Wants to Know at Puberty

June 11, 2015 by Jill Whitney

Many parents make a point of talking with their daughters about puberty, at least about periods, so girls won’t be scared when menstruation starts. But parents may not be as likely to talk with their sons. This is a mistake. Although the signature event of boys’ puberty (first wet dream) is more likely to be […]